Thinksquad’s FAQ
Q: What does FAQ stand for?
A: Most people think it stand for Frequently Asked Questions, but that’s an old wives tale, it actually means, Free Anal Quest.
Q: How did you come up with the name Thinksquad?
A: We actually had a shitload of names to pick from, and this is what we drew from the hat. The runner up was Grilled Cheezious
Q: Who is Thinksquad?
A: Cages full of Apes, that will someday over throw planet earth, and have human men and women as our slaves. That day will come when you’re strolling on the beach and you see the broken ass Statue of Liberty out there.
Q: Where do you come up with your ideas?
A: Actually an angel named Moroni, sends them to us on golden plates that we have to shove in a hat to convert into text that you can understand.
Q: How many people write for Thinksquad?
A: Mostly 1, but occasionally when the other members get off their lazy asses and help me row this fucking boat, we can actually have up to 5.
Q: You make fun of Religion; you do know you can go to H-E-double Hockey sticks for that?
A: Thanks for the warm invite, but your version of Hell and our version, are two totally different things.
Q: Do you know Jesus loves you?
A: Yes, we know, but most Mexicans love us.
Q: Does Thinksquad make money?
A: We anticipate profitability by 2043 – by then we should be retired; someone smarter might take over. Until then, we’re still the lovable scamps we’ve always been.
Q: How can I get a hold of Thinksquad to suggest topics or just to shoot the shit, and ask you guys how your day is?
A: Our email address is bobby@thinksquad.net, or reach us on our Facebook or Twitter pages, if you need to reach us by phone, call the operator, and ask for the CTU (Counter Terrorism Unit) to reach us.
Q: What is your favorite word?
A: When we were in college we had an English Professor who made each of us stand up every Monday, and read what our word of the week is? The one that got the most response was the word Smegma. Here’s the definition from Webster himself, Emanuel Lewis: cheesy sebaceous matter that collects between the glans penis and the foreskin or around the clitoris and labia minora.
They don’t even use “Cheesy” to describe Cheese Wiz. We hope you weren’t eating.
Q: Do you believe in the Woman’s right to choose?
A: What is she choosing here, between watching the Prices Right, or having a plate put in her lip? We choose the plate, that Prices Right should have a parental warning. What’s up with those Showcase Girls? We haven’t seen people smile that much since the Nazi’s told the Jews not to worry and just go take a shower.
Q: Is Thinksquad an EOE? (Equal Opportunity Employer)
A: Let’s see we have two British lesbians, two Bi-sexuals, and a half-German half-Asian male. We are never allowed to argue, because that would be a Hate Crime.
Q: Do you think Republicans and Democrats will ever get along?
A: You know we learned a lot from John Hughes movies, like Breakfast Club and Sixteen Candles. When people from different groups start making out in a closet, people then come together.
Q: What is your political afflation?
A: Wig. No, we are actually Anarchist